Internet Friendships: Why They (Don't) Work Either... Sometimes!(Part 1)

The internet is a funny place.

It can bring out the best in people or it can bring out the worst in them. You can make millions from a simple idea or you could find yourself being trolled half to death by cruel people. It isn't the best place in the world but some of us make do. Some of us don't get out very often so our social lives happen to be through the games we play or the social media we use. It kind of sucks but that is the way the cookie crumbles.

But, much like internet relationships, friendships.... Well...

They suck. Hardcore. Very rare do you even find the true friend on there and when you do, its best to hold onto them tightly and NEVER let go.

Sounds familiar, doesn't it?

I know.

I went into ranting(two posts even!) about internet relationships and why romantic stuff doesn't work unless you are extremely committed to it and both sides can work it out. Even then, it might not because the people might fall in love with your internet persona then the person you really are.

The same can be applied to your friendships.

Once again... I speak from experience. AGAIN.

Why this reflects to Internet Relationships...? Before getting on to the main point, it is time for a story. Well, okay, I suppose I'll admit a few things too.

I am a Role Player. No, not the kind who sits naked with a box of tissues and has erotic orgies all night. I am the kind who will make a character ans give their creation a story. Personality. Flaws. Likes. Dislikes. I'll even pretend to be them for the sake of entertainment. This is a hobby that has extended out into my online gaming habits. This has also led me to make many "friends."

One of them was, for the sake of this article, we'll simply call Jerry. Since I was the wonderful fresh age of nineteen and out of high school, I met Jerry and his brother playing together with the coolest creation ever. They took advantage of the MMO's engine to make pretty awesome characters and I looked up to them like they were heroes! Well, one of them, anyway... They were my idols. They were awesome incarnate that could punch stars and call it a day!

I became great friends with Jerry. We reconnected on Facebook and remained friends for many years! It was one of those friendships I really treasured. One of those friendships I thought would out last the game itself and imagined how cool if Jerry and his wife came to visit and share all kind of stories... that is... until I came BACK into the game.

Remember how I mentioned about internet relationships that you never really truly know a person on the internet?

Well....

... in some cases, it can be applied to this case too.

I was invited back into the game and into this super awesome group that would be a group of friends that'd have awesome epic role playing adventures. I was very psyched about this. Being with this icon, and OTHER icons and friends of mine that I looked up to, in this group? I've always wanted something like this! This was a great "dream" come true! I was so into it!

So much, there was even a commissioned picture of it. I still carry the picture on my wall. Since its so awesome, it became the logo for the whole article. Why? Because it is that awesome. Thats why.


Its something I've always wanted. It felt like a testament to what I've always dreamt of in an internet friendship.

... It wasn't meant to be.

Paradise began to show its cracks and I wasn't the only one who saw it. One particular man, Tom, was the best friend to Jerry. I've never heard of Tom before but it didn't take long to see the extremely ugly side of this group when Tom was around. The once-was happy and equal group became a negative pile of negative puke who really made fun of others or complained to the point of whining about the game changes or just show how "elite" they were in their PvP(Player verses Player) combat.

While Jerry was my idol, Tom was definitely Jerry's. Tom was put on a pedestal I never saw anyone put on before... An even higher pedestal then I ever put Jerry on. When Tom was around, the stories centered about Tom and not many others really got much of a shot. It was Tom's world and Jerry was more then happy to be a part of it. Tom came to represent everything that I ever hated on the internet.

It also didn't help it made me feel... worthless to the group. Worthless. Pathetic. I felt I didn't amount to much. I was invited into their world and I had no... "place" in their world. No worth. Anything I said or did was always wrong and how Tom was always right. How Tom had a career in Las Vegas. How Tom carried sadistic grudges to people he hated. How Tom never forgave people.

How Tom was the best thing since slice bread.

Boy did I grow to hate as well as very intimidate and afraid of Tom.

I hated how Tom seemed to somehow turn the best of the group into its worst. I hated how when Tom came around, the group changed and it wasn't the group but it was Tom, Jerry, and another fella. It was a clique. It was petty, and I have no idea how many times I've ranted to several friends to avoid exploding on Tom needlessly... as well as afraid if I did lose my temper on this man, I'd face this supposed wrath he seemed to have.

He had that much "power" in the group. I loved the group. I wanted to be a part of it... even if I felt three people got the main course and the rest picked up scraps.

But, you know what? I also hate cliques. Always had and always will. I will be the first one to slap at people for doing it(especially if cliques HURT other people) and bring it to light. Maybe I won't always say it right but it gets its word across and things change. Friends would want to know about that and friends would fix that. Real friends would want to know about those feelings. Real friends would want to fix it so everyone would be happy and having fun together.

So! I felt it was a poison in the group and after one particular last straw, it was time to speak up and fix it. I mean, Jerry came through when the negativity poisoned the group before and maybe they'll understand. Maybe things will come through. Jerry and the others were my best friends. Speaking out should be alright around friends, right? I mean... We were a group of friends. Benefit of the doubt and all. Maybe speaking up will result in things being fixed.

What could possibly go wrong?